Dad Smacked

2009-05-26T02:20:00.000-07:00

"Retiring from Fashion Blogging....../"
This is my last outfit ever. Never wearing 'outfits' ever again, don't want to fashion blog no more. Just feel like the market is too saturated and everyone is copying me. Thought I was unique having a fashion blog. No.

From bottom 2 top:

Pants made of plastic- USA apparel rip off.

Crips (or bloods? IDK) leg tie to hold my school supplies. Cool to be nerdy.

Amazon warrior-imitation belt- cool to be a warrior.

London t-shirt. For my FAV city, but thinkin Berlin is cooler now??? Might squat in Berlin.

LOMO camera. New hobbie. Captures cool times. HATE DIGI CAMS SO MUCH

Coat hanger necklace- ironic and clever statement accessory regarding my pro choice abortion views. Cool to not b conservative. LOL

Scarf for temperature control.

Unlit cigarette because heard that smokin' causes cancers?

2009-04-14T14:07:00.000-07:00

Outfit of the Day
Trendspotters
Explaining trends

Hi, gunna go ahead & write this post in this nice lil purple colour, gotta lov the purpz. I know I haven't been reportin any "content" recently, but guyz, i'm workin on articles. I started new hobies to make my life even cooler. If you're bored..................you're not busy enough.

Dissection:

Bow- Going back to childhood roots. Taking inspiration from all levels of life, yknow? Might try incorporatin diapers next, would be pretty Shoreditch.

Garbage bag dress- Tryin' to be as environmental as I can. Goin......green. This is continuing the 'sustainable livin trend' I started last week. Good design is all abouts doing things no one has thout of before. Think I'm being prettie 'out there'. h8 it when everyone looks at me in the street when I'm tryin 2 b different, though. Let me live my life! Y do you h8 me???????????????????????/

Sustainable eco-bag: It's SOooo0 spacious! It can seriously fit my whoooole life, lolhaha. It has a piccie of a tree in it, that really brings home the 'eco' aspect of this bag 4 me. Love to flaunt my causes. It's eco friendly because I can use it over and over again. This is seriously grate for credit crunch fashions, I'm all about maximizing the money over here!

X-mas lights- Keepin' an element of Christianity in all my outfits, and christmas lites are from CHRIST-mAss get it? Carrying it around is pretty annoying, next time i wear this outfit I won't use this element.

This look was inspired by Gwyneth Paltrow and Chris Martin.

" been trying to meet you, you don't know how lovely you are "
" and it was all yellow"
"green eyes"
"clocks"

peace out

2009-04-11T12:29:00.000-07:00

Outfit of the Day

Trendspotters
Explaining trends

This is what I wore today. Today was real fun because first I went to shop for pomegranates, then my friend Russy D. and I dropped acid and watched all the dvds I borrowed ysterday. Really starting to get into ‘French New Waves’, it feels like it should be culturly relevant. Mite do a post about it and Jeanne-Luc ‘The God’ Goddy because it’s so sensitive and artisitic, like me. Are French New Waves a possible religion for the kids of the 21^st century, as ‘old’ religions like Christianity lose their relevance and importance and trendieness? Could it be like a religion for cool film buffies? Dunno.

NEWAY let me cut to the chase and contin-u to expound my fash.

Headband- Got this one at USA apparel. When you are dropping acid, you need to have as many things in control as possible, so I figured that I might as well have my fringe in control and look stylish while doing it, amirite? This headband is only for serious control freaks.

Scarves- The essence of my outfit is layering. I got all these scarves at various flea markets when I went to Paris, they still kind of smell funnie, but thinkin’ that funnie smells kind of fit in with the whole boho-hobo chic thing? Makes this outfit super authentic. (....if you ask......me)

Fishnet tshirt- I’m keeping with my ‘sluttie’ vibe here- ( Slutty homeless heroin addict studying fash design @ Central St Martin’s). Is my look too........ ‘complex’ for it to be accessible enuff to be trendie??? OR is it ‘dangerous and fierce-ass bitch’ enough to be edgie, and get photographed by street-style fotographers?

Pre-ripped tights from the Tops shop- So busy with my cool life that I don’t have time to DIY my tights; had 2 buy ready-made. LOVE the punk and goth aesthetic that’s so hot rite now. Thinkin’ of borrowing elements of skin-head fash next... hope i don’t accidently offend ppl, just cuz it’s JUS FASHION OK

Handbag- 100% eco friendly. When you put water on it it dissolves instantly, and if you are really tired of your fashion, you can just put it in the recycling bin. LOVE simple fashion. As you can see my bag is LOADED because I am busy studying for exams and writin’ essays. OMG HATE MY LIFE, DON’T HAVE TIME TO BE ‘SMART’! JUST WANT TO BE REAL AND HAVE FUN!

2009-04-10T13:52:00.000-07:00

Outfit of the day
Trend spotters
Explaining trends

This is what I wore today to go pick up some new dvds and then eat bagels on Brick Lane. I like this look because it mixes all of my fav fash inspirations, esp kate moss. Let me tell you about this outfit.

Hat- Was real inspired by looking at old women going 2 church (lol, going to church...so 1997, like when your parents used to force you!!!!! Cool now, maybe? I should go to church??? What religion should I pick???? Are all religions cool??). Picked up this lil number last weekend, so in love already.

Glasses- Kind of wurried that I'm jumpin on this hot trend to late. Is this trend now lukewarm? Is it now ironik? Is it so full of irony that it's gone back to cool agen? Is it funny? It kind of makes it look like I have an interesting and smart personality and read lots of books and watch Pulp Fiction, and I know how to make a joke. Think I'm gunno go pick up some books at the librarie next. Libraries= retro and ironic

Oversized mohair sweater- Found this lil baby beging me to buy it at the vintage shop next 2 my house. Oversized fashion is really cool because it can make you look skinnie and 'heroin chic', kind of like Kate Moss or even Pete Doherty.

Piece of lace curtain- Just want to b innocent. It's important to make bold statements in the fashion world, I think this look will really throw everywun off and make a fresh new wave in the trendosphere.

Thinkin of making a zine...............

2009-03-21T13:11:00.000-07:00

So I was just sippin’ my cup of chai tea (thinking of pickin up binge drinking..... heard it’s in........) when I realised I had a gr8 idea, guys. I’m going to make a zine to express out all of my valuable opinions........... So tired of my opinions being crushed. So tired of no one listening to me. So tired of my friends laughing at my opions. Just want to express myself. Feeling so suffocated. I’m gonna be heard the artistic way. It’s prittie important to be tech-savy and stuff but sumtimes you just got to go back to your roots, amirite? Here is a pic of a tech-savy guy reading an

Bonuses of zines include

-It’s prettey easy to cre8
-feeling artistic and creative. V. meaningful.
-connecting to grassroot movements, being so real, being the realest thing
-getting famous for sharing your thoughts, kind of like celebrity blogging on paper????? So weird.
-you only need your ideas and paper, man

What can I write about in my zine????? Kinda have some topics in mind.

-Organic burlap farming outfits among the early settlers of Central-Eastern Europe, how real that is. New idea for Am. Apparel? Don’t THINK so! Got u, Dov Charney. Sartorial inspiration for the future.
-Feminist dialect among insects and how 2 fight for their rights on the community level. Leave no intellekt stone unturned.
-50 new ways to steal everything you want 2 own, f*** the man. Creating a spinnof punk genre from this idea.

Wut do you think?????????? R u going to go make yr zine? Want to start a zine distro? R u artistic? How du YOU express yrself? Do you compose music? Do you make arts? Pix or it don't exist.

CATSMACKED

2009-03-08T18:08:00.001-07:00

SO catsmacked#s offish the new BItcHIn trend@ in Marchmont much?

MArchmont! the way you hate me is better than love, and i'm head over heels.

GVT????????????????????????!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

2009-03-01T01:19:00.000-08:00

So i was just thinkin. Being socially responsible & stuff is getting kind of ‘trendie’ in the underground. All my fav. Musical artizts are supporting cool causes. Kind of wanna jump on this hot trend before it gets 2 mainstream???? fuck that shit.

But then I realised that its real confuzing?

We have culturly been made2believe (aka mentallie ingrained) that you have to ‘fuck the government (GVT)’. Whole generations (80’s and 90’s rave kids) have been teaching us that 2b cool you have to h8 your gvt. Here are some vintage archival piccies i found.

Note the negative ~vibe~ in these piccies please

Well, now that Obamas is in the gvt making spare CHANGE, everywun is questioning ‘wtf, i love him, now if i h8 the gvt i will look so00 uncool!’ this is a dangerous situation, guys. We have 2 have a kultur revolution becuz im feeling dated and stuff. We have 2 change our oufit, exsept change the outfit of our minds, you know?

But we have so many complex issuez we need 2 change! Were do we start? We start by making questions. Shit always starts with questions???? I m going 2 quote my fav politics leader of ALL TYME, the freshest Pol. sci. man besides Obamas.

Miss u 2 much!!! In conclusion, i remembered that JFK is not rilly dead. Besides living on fiery in our harts, he is also reincarnated in popular Canadian DJ allstars duo of dynamics MSTRKRFT.

Here is a piccie of JFK with Steve

This meanz that politics is finally in the underground, guys.

~*~*~*~*~*~2 b continued~*~*~*~*~*~

CHEESBURGERS AND BIRD KISSES,

BFM VON DISKO

safe sainsburys

2009-02-23T14:28:00.000-08:00

hey bros. saw this loser trying to still still push the safety look down at the 'supermarkert;'

cycle helmet indoors;twat

hew can the avant garde be avant garde without being avante garde youknow?

2009-02-19T08:42:00.001-08:00

cuz reelly post bx chic has potent. to be the nxt big marchmont thing but irdk. it's all sOO cliched alreads

urgh

2009-02-19T08:39:00.001-08:00

(look at this dork!! ijdk oklike safety really, last month? no

Safety shit(chic, chit, get it)

2009-02-18T10:51:00.000-08:00

HEy blogersphere.

i think i;l just come out and say that i think that safety chich is not rad anymore. i see lots of bros and titswithlegsandleggingsandstringheadbands with safety chic outside of marchmont: bruntsfield, southside, even fuckin new town (!?!?)

use to be that SC was only a leith thing and it was ironic then it was real. this is an urban jungle, cats r ready to jump on you and then you'll chase those cats with all your friends and beat it with sticks until its dead and then you'll marvel (OIHHH BIG WRDS) at how its old and thats probably why it turned to maneating...

anyway the rest of the blog team wont like me 4 this but i could give a electropop fuck.

electropop sucks too btw.

another note, why does everyone think that i am good at basketball, can't figure it out

any ideas blogoshits?

yn?

SHIT MOTHERFUCKER

2009-02-18T03:33:00.000-08:00

LOOK AT THAT MAN, FUCK IT'S A FUCKING SAFETY HAT, LOOK AT THE VISOR THINGY DUDE THAT SHIT WILL KEEP EVERYTHING AWAY FROM YOUR EYES AND MAKE YOU LOOK SO FUCKING COOL WHILE YOU WLK ARND MARCHMONT. SHIT HOMEY IT HAS BUILT-IN HEADPHONES + EARPROTECTORS SO YOU CAN LISTEN TO LINKIN PARK AND NO MOTHERFUCKER CAN TOUCH YOUR EARS. CHECK THE FUCKING COLOUR SCHEME ON THIS BADBOY SHIT, YOU KNOW YOU GOING TO LOOK SO FUCKING BALLIN IN IT. SHIT MOTHERFUCKER IT'S A DAMN FUCKING SAFETYCHIC HELMET X 1000000000000.
SHIT IS SO CASH.

Scooby Snacks (Pt. 2)

2009-02-17T10:25:00.000-08:00

Get your wabs out, the Beeb are on board. That's right, safety-chic was leaked in a dazzling exposé on the cult-classic underground radio show "The Rumble Hour", fronted by the "the thinking man's John Peel", "Tom Martin".

Anyway, the lowdown upshot of this downbeat highbrow affair is that the BBC, always eager for a scoop on the latest youth crazes, are all over safety-chic like a yeast infection. They recently signed Urban Fucktards (pictured above) to their in-house label, kitted them out in the latest in cutting-edge Marchmont tailory and sent them packing for a gruelling 8 year tour of Scotland in the British Broadcasting Corporation shaggin' wagon (affectionately christened Mabel by all involved). They will be performing a sonic selection box of their critically ill radio smash hits, such as "Oh No, I've Lost All My Fucking Ganj Again" and "Your Virginity, I Haz It".
Close your windows, shut your doors, lock up your daughters and keep your wife under house arrest, the 'tards are coming to town...

Safety hits paris - ed banger exclusive

2009-02-13T11:56:00.001-08:00

"It's yellow, it's ugly, it doesn't go with anything, but it's TOTALLY COOL"
So like safety is apparently cool in pa-ree now? well who knows fashon better than the french dig? They got their luminescants all put out. liberté, egalité, safté, that's what they sé.
what is feadz up to with his swish black bowtie? "That is totally gay" said one parisien, what a dick. but a cool dick.

BOM BOM BOM BOM BOM BOM

2009-02-12T13:34:00.000-08:00

SO I met these cool bitches in shoredatch last night. so I keep seeing this hybrid of like, 'high' fashion and high like 'safety' 'wear' (cut big like a safety vest but maybe just slightly)) bigger than an "actual" safety vest this combo has the potntial to create a GReat visual mix of texture and patterns? No thank you . yeah

CANADA - too safe?

2009-02-09T09:20:00.000-08:00

WARNING NOT A FASHION PIECE!!!!:

ISSUES:

I've noticed that a lot of people here in Marchmont (a.[the new Shoreditch [which used to be the new W'zburgz {which could be Kreuzlauershain anywayday now}]] iff b. P K[good fashion plus low rent places where bros and chicas can communely live and create art]) have been doing the whole 'safety-chic' or 'sekurity-stil' thing for a while. lots of geezerz and tits-with-faces I have seen in the many locals and galleries 'round these HERE PARTS. I have been thinking, I know it's meant to poke fun in the whole 'o gosh life is precious preserve it thing' and like how its really actually funny to like be pro life as a joke, but i am wondering or like, i have been thinking, it's sort of like just being Canadian (aka, Kanadian). I know it's ironic and everything, but, there's just something...annnoying (?) or pathetic about sitting around all day eating peameal bacon, watching NFBC shit on the web, saying 'deked him out', and being a really big fan of MTL or TO or FAILBERTA. ANyway, there is no reason for the Skocz (aka, Scots) to act like they really are going to get dad smacked, because Ashton only films dad smacked in LA because he has epilepsy and if he wears anything but a sk8brd shirt it sets off his fits. i've been thinking that its probably racist to make fun of Canux...but I dunno - they are really safe all the time. Once I took these Canadians (aka, Sheep-people) to a pub and they all ran to the bathroom so fast and got stuck in the door and the barkeep had to throw 40 hungry cats at them. their safety hats and cool scarfs didnt help them. Issues make people sad? Life is for living and since you have to try things to find out your own individual mode of thought, aren't Canadians condemning themselves to a life of subservient culture to better places like Marchmont and Glasgow?

Latest Story! Pssst 'slebs nabbin' fashion tips from the Canadians!

2009-02-09T02:56:00.000-08:00

Inspired by the mean streets of Marchmont, this season's hot new fad has spread internationally like wildfire. It seems as though all our fave peeps are now discarding their grillz&knuckbustas and instead donning wild fluorescents and sweet gear to create the new look: safety chic

Papped! Beyonsafeté chillin' out on deck
Papped! SafetySchiele poses for Sizzlin'Mag
Papped! Bonnie Prince Safety sunbathing
Papped! SafeChaff in his home town in LA.

Ain't no party like a Dad Smacked party

2009-02-08T16:07:00.001-08:00

So we've had about approximately 7.29038 ft of snow here in Shoreditch and the Dad Smacked krew are having a crazy snow party tomorrow night to celebrate and you're all invited mayngs and hoes. Come down to Hoxton bar grill for 22.36 and we'll all stand around looking cool while people take photos of us for cool websites. Bring cocaine to make it whiter than white. Don't forget to roll deep.

Shit won't just be cool, it'll be sub-zero!!!!

And then I left the house. Oh.

2009-02-06T16:26:00.000-08:00

i m ALWAYS thinkin that mibby glasgow is 2 cool? m thinkin of movin 2 toronto (TO) ? because if you think about it (iyti) then i coud start sum indie pops bnds there and it would be cool and original insted of redundint and lame and not rly. bloggable? ne way saw these women yesterday at this plce called mona or sumthi? like how the shirt is buttoned all the way up cuz nerd + alcoholism = rly way out? its just pop music get over it?

FashSpot No.2 - Safe Canadian

2009-02-06T16:06:00.000-08:00

I was in my kitchen when I came across this hunky chop, sporting serious claes, atop my windowsill. I was immediately aroused by his effortless grace; moving like a christmas tree sinking in blancmange. I thought his fasces of spring onions worked well as a Eve to the totally scrotnig Adam of a cycling helmet. In short, safety is really awesome hipchic.

Just had a cup of coffee

2009-02-06T10:45:00.001-08:00

That's it.

Jacked Up & Cracked Up On Methylated Spirits (Again) [Live In Oregon]

2009-02-06T10:39:00.000-08:00

I really love this look. This guy has it all, raven locks, cheap gold watch and the classic, iconic, Kafka-esque finger-in-mouth pose that, aside from adding instant Bard-of-Avon glamslicker vibes, makes me want his babies.

His limited-edition, perfectly fitting tee is from a run of only 42 and a half and, apart from exhibiting his well-built pectoral musculators, has a beautifully ironic logo that highlights the plight of chickens in battery farms the world over waiting for swift slaughter by McDonalds.

I only wish I could one day be as effortlessly cool as this man. The only thing he lacks is a helmet.

*Sigh...*

FashSpot No.1 - Sexy Shoreditch Shaman

2009-02-06T10:24:00.000-08:00

I thought it suitable to start this blog with a post about London fashion, I snapped this guy on the street in Shoreditch and loved his style immediately.

The glasses just scream hipster-nerd cool and look so good. Man check those braces, he's really chanelling skinhead sytle with his own amazing twist, the colours of the whole outfit just go together SO well and he pulls off a challenging look to perfection. Overall a brilliant look to start the blog off with.